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Dark Rainforest Path

Warning Signs of Abuse

Some warning signs of abuse in the home or in a relationship include: 

  • Pushing for quick involvement: Comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone." 

  • Jealousy: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; prevents you from going to work because 'you might meet someone." 

  • Controlling Behavior: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you're late) about whom you talked to and where you were; keeps all the money; insists you ask permission to do anything 

  • Unrealistic expectations: Expects you to be the perfect mate and meet their every need 

  • Isolation: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses people who support you of "causing trouble." 

  • Blaming others for problems or mistakes: It's always someone else's fault when anything goes wrong 

  • Making others responsible for his or her feelings: The abuser says, "You make me angry," instead of "I am angry" or says, "You're hurting me by not doing what I tell you." 

  • Hypersensitivity: Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he or she is mad 

  • Cruelty to animals or children: Kills or punishes animals brutally. Also, they may expect children to do things that are far beyond their ability (whip a 3-year-old for wetting a diaper) or tease them when they cry 

  • Use of force during sex: Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex 

  • Verbal abuse: Constantly criticizes or says blatantly cruel, hurtful things, degrades, curses, calls you ugly names 

  • Rigid Roles: Expects you to serve, obey, and remain at home 

  • Sudden mood swings: Switches from sweet to violent in minutes 

  • Past battering: Admits to hitting a mate in the past but says the person "made" them do it 

  • Threats of violence: Says things like, "I'll break your neck," or "I'll kill you," and then dismisses them with, "I didn't mean it." 

  • Controlling behaviors using social media or technology 

© River Valley Battered Women and Children's Shelter

24HR HOTLINE:

(479) 968-3110

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